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February 18, 2014

By: Richard Rawlings

CARS

10 Ways to Cope with Fast N’ Loud Withdrawals

WE KNOW, WE KNOW. YOUR MONDAY NIGHTS HAVEN’T BEEN THE SAME WITHOUT US. YOU’VE BEEN FORCED TO PEEL YOURSELF OFF THE COUCH IN SEARCH OF OTHER FORMS OF ENTERTAINMENT. OR MAYBE YOU’RE CHEATING ON US WITH ANOTHER MONDAY NIGHT SHOW. IT’S OK. WE CAN GET THROUGH THIS.

THE GOOD NEWS IS, FAST N’ LOUD IS COMING BACK WITH ALL NEW EPISODES IN MARCH, SO FOR THOSE OF YOU EXPERIENCING FAST N’ LOUD WITHDRAWALS, THERE’S HOPE IN SIGHT. WE’LL LET YOU KNOW AS SOON AS THE OFFICIAL DATE IS SET, BUT UNTIL THEN WE’D LIKE TO OFFER THESE CLINICALLY PROVEN COPING MECHANISMS.

10 WAYS TO COPE WITH FAST N’ LOUD WITHDRAWALS

1.  GROW A BEARD.

2.  IF YOU CAN’T GROW A BEARD, FIND SOMEONE WITH A BEARD AND ASK IF YOU CAN ADOPT HIM AND CHANGE HIS NAME TO AARON.

3.  GO TO THE ZOO. WATCH THE MONKEYS THROW POO AT EACH OTHER.

4.  MAKE LOUD, EXAGGERATED CAR SOUNDS WITH YOUR MOUTH WHEN TURNING CORNERS IN YOUR CAR. OR WHEN ROUNDING CORNERS OUT OF YOUR CAR.

5.  POINT TO PEOPLE WITH BOTH HANDS AND SAY, “WHAOW!

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